Diversity 101 May 29, 2007
Posted by Matt in Uncategorized.Tags: race, Rachel
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Originally Posted 5/29/07
My older daughter, Rachel, is a very inquisitive child, always question about this or that in her relentless pursuit of knowledge of this world we live in. This morning, her brow furrowed in deep scrutinizing thought, she looked at me and asked, rather matter-of-factly, “Daddy why are people different colors? Some are white and some are brown and some are black, why?”
So, I sat for a moment and pondered over her innocent search for knowledge, how exactly do you answer that question from a five year old? Do you talk about adaptability in the context of human evolution? Do you talk about the biologic polymer melanin and the effects of generations of sun exposure? Do you curtly answer, “Because God made them that way, ” and expect her to accept your solution?
No, the biology lesson is probably a bit complex for a four year old (even one as precocious as Rachel) and she’s too smart to receive the simplest answer without further questioning. So, rather than regaling her with a dermatological lesson or undermining her intelligence with a short response meant to quiet her, I turned the answer into an object lesson in tolerance and diversity.
“Honey,” I asked,” Is there anybody in the world exactly like you?”
She cocked her little head and gazed up at me quizzically, “No.”
“That’s right, you are the only Rachel who looks and acts and thinks like you do.” She hesitantly nodded her head in agreement, so I pressed on, “It’s the differences between us that make us and everybody else special. It wouldn’t be very fun if everybody was exactly like you, would it?”
She cracked a small smile and let out a little girl giggle, “No.”
“Of course it wouldn’t be any good if we were all the same! So we were each made to be different – we talk different, we act different, we think different, and we look different – some of us are even different colors. Even though we are different, we still talk to each other and play together and love each other.”
Nodding up and down and wide eyed with wonder at her newfound bit of knowledge, she replied with a simple, “Oh.”
When we arrived at the day care this morning, Rachel promptly ran into her classroom and her friends, of all different races and backgrounds, met her with a warm deluge of, “Hi, Rachel!” In no time at all, she was hard at play with her preschool playmates, all of them – the black, the white, and the hispanic – with no regard to their ethnicity or background.
There’s an awful lot you can learn from children and today, though I instructed her with my words, she taught me even more with her actions. Let’s all be good to each other – whether we are poor or rich, or black or white. Whether we speak English well or not. Whether we live in the right neighborhood or drive the right car or wear the right clothes or not. Whether we deeply love someone of the opposite or the same sex. Whether we go to a different church or belong to another faith or perhaps hold nothing as holy truth.
Thank you for teaching me so much today, Rachel.
A Scene From Tonight’s Republican Debate May 15, 2007
Posted by Matt in Uncategorized.Tags: debate, presidential race, republican
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Originally posted 5/15/07
**Note: I actually didn’t watch tonight’s debate, but this is how I imagine things transpired…
Chris Wallace (Moderator): Thank you for joining us for tonight’s Republican Presidential candidate debate. To begin tonight’s festivities, we, on behalf of whatever network is showing this tonight, would like to convey our deepest sympathies to the family of the late Reverend Jerry Falwell and to those who attend Liberty University. Reverend Falwell is best known for founding the Moral Majority, which helped give rise to conservative Christian politicians around the nation, but not everyone agreed with Falwell on many of the stances he took. Senator McCain, you once called the Reverend an “agent of intolerance,” but recently you made peace with him and hailed his great influence. What are your feelings today after learning about his death?
John McCain: Well…I…ummm….well….ummm….you know, it’s always a tragedy when people are taken away from us, especially young people. And there are many young people that gave their lives for this great country of ours in places like Vietnam. Did you know I was in Vietnam? I…ummmm….what was the question again?
Rudy Giuliani: Look…I…I…I think that Sen…Sen…Senator McCain is saying that the Rev..Rev…Reverand Falwell was not a terr..terrorist and he did not, I repeat did not, cause the attacks on 9/11. Do you remember 9/11? I did good back then.
Mitt Romney: With all due respect, Mayor Giuliani, I don’t understand how somebody that has had three wives, but never more than one at a time, could be counted on to lead this great nation. Back to the question, while Mr. Falwell may have been a good man, he will not get his own planet like I will when I die….
Giuliani: I…I…I…don’t see wha..what my former wives have to do with this. At least I…I..I’m not named after a baseball glove.
Tom Tancredo: (with a wild look in his eyes) All of you listen!! Don’t you see what’s going on? The good Reverend’s death? 9/11? Mayor Giuliani’s endless parade of wives? It’s those darn illegal immigrants I tell you! Curse them! Curse them all!
Mike Huckabee: When I think of the great Reverand Falwell, I think of his big, commanding voice, his Christian conviction and the fact that he was morbidly obese. Did you know I used tobe a little on the chunky side, too? But I lost a lot of weight and this is how….
Romney: Zip it, Huck. Don’t forget the Fancher party….
Jim Gilmore: Hey everybody! I’m here too! (Everyone acts like they don’t hear him).
McCain: I….ummm….I like cake.
Duncan Hunter: Zzzzzzz…….
Wallace: Now on to the Iraq war. Mayor Giuliani, what is your assessment of our current situation in Iraq.
Giuliani: The…The…They attacked us on 9/11, s..s…so we will de..de…defeat them. Do you remember 9/11? I did good back then.
Tancredo: It doesn’t matter why they come here or what foreign nation they come from. It doesn’t matter if they are from one of our so-called “allies.” Once they cross our border, they are the enemy!
Huckabee: Diet and exercise. Diet and exercise.
Romney: Fancher…. (Huckabee immdiately quietens down)
Tancredo: I won’t even eat at Taco Bell! It only gives aid and comfort to the enemy.
McCain: Where am I again? (Suddenly McCain is back in the Cambodian jungle and that man behind the podium is just another of his tormentors)
McCain: Die, you slant-eyed scum! (He lunges at Wallace, stabbing him in the neck with a pen)
Wallace: Argghhh….
Suddenly an old man totters up to the stage and stops just a few feet from where the candidates stand. Why, it’s Charlton Heston!
Suddenly, he pulls out a large machine gun and mows down the entire field of candidates, cutting a bloody swathe through them – not stopping until every last one of the candidates lies in a heap on the floor.
Heston: Well, Mr. Gingrich, are you ready to announce your candidacy?
Newt Gingrich: I believe I am. Thanks Chuck.
Cartoon Politics May 13, 2007
Posted by Matt in Uncategorized.Tags: cartoons, politics, popeye, Rachel, smurfs
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Originally posted 5/13/07
Every once in a while, DirectTV bequeaths additional channels on us for a short period of time, no doubt to convince us to upgrade our package, so, I always feel compelled to take a little extra television time during these few days of an augmented viewing package to see what I might not realize I am lacking. So, earlier today I was sitting on the couch with Rachel and clicked over to that wonderful lexicon of classic cartoons, Boomerang. During this 60 minute or so period in which we were perched together with our eyes glued to the magic screen of brain-rotting ecstacy, I began analyzing these programs on a different level, trying to decide through the process of eisegesis an interpretation of just what meaning of these shows are for us today in our current political climate.
The first cartoon in question was Popeye – for those of you that don’t know, Popeye is a muscle-bound sailor with a girlfriend named Olive Oyle, who gains special powers from ingesting canned spinach. After mulling over the actions and words of said characters, I believe I’ve come to the conclusion that Popeye the Sailor Man is little more than a mouthpiece for right-wing propaganda. First of all, in many Conservative circles, women are not seen to be endowed with skills and intelligence on par with men. Many times they are seen as servants for the man – cooking and cleaning and taking care of the kids, etc. etc., with little thought for their own gifts. Olive Oyle fits this role to perfection, thus perpetuating a sexual stereotype that has for the most part been put to rest in today’s world – her method of speech, in which various words are regularly mispronounced, belies any semblance of intelligent thought and the way that she always needs her man, Popeye, to come to her rescue gives her an aura of helplessness or weakness that ought not be. Popeye, also exudes Conservative qualities like the odor of the cheap, canned leafy slimy vegetation that he constantly pours into his stomach. Perhaps this is no more evident than in his rush to violence in every problem that arises – it seems like every time that Olive Oyle gets into trouble, Popeye shows up to pummel his opponent with his formidable fists. Leaving his adversary in a heap on the ground, as he walks away with his female prize. Also, the spinach itself, which gives Popeye massive amounts of energy and the perceived ablility to do anything, seems to correlate with the abuse of methamphetamines in our rural areas – which are decidedly conservative.
The second bit of vintage animation that the two of us absorbed was none other than the Smurfs, which is in regards to a race of little blue people who live happy, harmonious lives – an obvious piece of Leftist Communist indoctrination directed at our angelic American children. Naturally, I watched it with my four year old. The utopian society built by the Smurfs is decidedly Marxist – with everyone looking nearly the same and knowing their own individual roles within the national conglomerate. Papa Smurf then takes on the General Mao role, giving his people what they need to survive, but ruling with an iron fist nevertheless. The Smurfs seem to be genuinely resigned and happy with their roles in the larger society – whether they be physical strength (Hefty Smurf) or intelligence (Brainy Smurf) – which is a very dangerous idea to foist upon our innocent children, leaving them with the impression that there is such a things as the “Greater Good,” and that staying in their position in life to benefit their fellow countrymen is a bad thing. Also, the fact that Smurfette is the only female in the magical blue clan leads one to think that this Smurfing society is even more like Communist China than any of us may have imagined! Perhaps once the Smurfs build up an army of enough males, who are willing and able to lift up arms, they will defeat Gargamelle (who represents the U.S.) and his devilish cat Azrael (can anybody say the U.K.?) and then push on their invading forces to conquer the lands of the Snorks and anybody else who may be in their way!
So, what do you think? Do cartoons have definite political/social leanings and, if so, what are they?
Ten For Tuesday: Old School Nintendo May 8, 2007
Posted by Matt in Uncategorized.Tags: nintendo, top ten
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Originally Posted 5/8/07
Like many children in the 80’s and early 90’s, we owned one of the wonderful little gray boxes of brain rotting delight, a Nintendo. Our parents bought the machine that I still have in my possession today back in the mid-80’s, around the time it was first introduced in the states. From the wonderful world of the Mario brothers to the mind-numbing repetitiveness of Duck Hunt to the mind-bending puzzles of Zelda, it was always a staple in our household. So, today’s top ten list concerns a few of the many games that occupied our minds and time as stimulation-hungry children.
10. Spyhunter – Are there many things cooler to a young boy than the prospect of driving a speedy sportscar equipped with machine guns? Even though, according to Wikipedia, this game had no end, it was still a lot of fun.
9. Kid Niki: Radical Ninja – He’s radical, he’s a ninja, and the evil stone wizard has kidnapped his girlfriend….oh yeah, it’s on! With a cry of “Will help you!” (ninjas don’t spend much time on grammar), our hero runs to the rescue.
8. Tecmo Bowl – This football game remains a great source of entertainment today, despite the fact that each time only has four plays. Just pick Chicago, with Walter Payton, and you’ll do just fine.
7. Kid Icarus – I first saw this game at my friend Nick’s house when we were youngsters and the two of us played it for hours at a time. Despite the time we put into this endeavor, every session ended with Icarus in the throes of death, crying out, “I’m finished!”
6. Metroid – It was a great game and it was groundbreaking and all of that, but, because I suck so badly at all video games, it was never much fun for me. I will give Samus and company some props, though, for making one that stood the test of time.
5. Contra – Without the seemingly limitless lives brought about by up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-b-a-start, I would have never made it anywhere in this game, but that little magic code turns this into one of the most fun and accessible game in the catalog.
4. Baseball Games – Though Tecmo Bowl and Double Dribble were enjoyable, baseball was king on the old NES. Great games like Bases Loaded (does anybody else remember Paste or Norkus), Major League Baseball (which used real players, but it was incredibly easy) and Baseball Stars (quite possibly the best baseball game on the NES system), anchored a great niche in the gaming univese.
3. Mike Tyson’s Punch Out!! – This is another game that has remained entertaining to this day. Using Little Mac to take out bigger, tougher boxers like Pison Honda and Bald Bull, or to make King Hippo drop his drawers, or beating the coke swilling Soda Popinski, were some of the best times to be had in Nintendo-land.
2. Super Mario Brothers (I, II, and III) – There are few things greater than the original Super Mario Bros. trilogy on the NES. The original game opened the gateway to video games for a whole generation of young people while the two sequels set the bar higher and higher. Mario III may be the pinnacle of the NES.
1. The Legend of Zelda – If there is one old Nintendo game that you can have, make it this one. The campaign of Link to rescue the princess from the evil Gannon, in an open world filled with puzzles and mysteries and secrets, still ranks as one of the greatest video game experiences ever concocted.
