Throwback Thursday #10 April 1, 2010
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: black jellybeans, conspiracy, easter, Easter bunny, racism
add a comment
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 4 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Originally posted 4/13/2009
The Problem with Easter
Tonight I was sampling a few of my daughters’ jelly beans when a thought about the Easter holiday struck me like a lightning bolt. Now, this thought didn’t revolve around the resurrection of Jesus or magical bunnies or baskets or pastel-colored eggs, no this was something much more distressing, something even more disturbing than giant-sized Easter bunny costumes. I think I’ve discovered the problem with this so-called holiday!
Racism.
Yes, that’s right. Easter ranks right up there with that jolly old white man breaking into people’s houses to “leave presents” but somehow never getting caught by the police and with kids in ghost costumes that make them conspicuously look as though they just left an elementary school Klan rally. But I’m here to tell you brothers and sisters that Easter may be just as bad.
So, you ask, what could possibly be wrong with Easter? Why, this is a time for remembering that glorious resurrection of Jesus. It is a time for family and good will as we usher in the rebirth of spring. Yet, amid the happiness there is something far more sinister lurking.
Evidence? You need some proof of the evil racism hiding behind the façade of pink and blue eggs? Okay, try this.
Does anybody actually like black jellybeans? No, of course not! They’re disgusting. Now, some might look at this predicament and say that perhaps it is only a coincidence that the black jellybeans are the only ones that are inedible. They say that maybe it is just by chance that, among delectable candies of yellow and orange and red and blue and purple and even white, the black treats lay like disgusting little licorice-flavored turds, but we all know that this is not just some haphazard fall of the cards! We know that this measure has been carefully calculated by The Man! It is a conspiracy, I tell you! The government! The government is in on this, Believe Me!
Come to think of it, have you ever seen a black Easter bunny? NO! Every time they are lily white or maybe a little bit brown to appease the Hispanic kids, but never, ever black. It’s a conspiracy! A conspiracy, I say!
So, from now on, we at Words of Wisdom are calling for a boycott of all things Easter until those in power will give recognition to this calamity. Write letters to your Congressman, to your governor, to the president, to anybody and tell them that we demand equal representation! We demand black jellybeans no longer be some mysterious licorice flavor that coats your taste buds and puts a damper on all culinary delights for the rest of the day. From now on, we implore you to make them chocolate flavored or something else that is both scrumptious and befitting its color.
We will march the streets in Washington! We will carry signs and for your overt racial discrimination! We will burn stuffed white rabbits in effigy! We will haunt your every move until you correct this terrible wrong!
Or, at least until the Easter candy goes on sale again…
Throwback Thursday #9 October 29, 2009
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: Charlie Brown, halloween, linus, peanuts, The Great Pumpkin
add a comment
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 4 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Originally Posted 10/29/07
Lessons from Linus
I just finished watching that Halloween classic, It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, with my girls and, as always seems to happen, I was struck by the sparkling dialogue between the featured children that goes far beyond conversations normally found in works of animation. Most notably, I find myself drawn to the unbridled optimism of Linus, who, with his tattered blanket and impressive vocabulary, carries you along on his mission of faith and hope in the face of opposition and scorn. I think we can learn quite a bit from this figure whose genesis came at the tip of a pen.
I love the first scene of the show, where Linus and his sneering sister Lucy roll a pumpkin into the house, where Lucy summarily grasps a knife, slices away the top of the large gourd, and scoops out its innards, dumping them upon the floor with a plop. Linus, though, in his innocence and respect for life wails out, “You didn’t tell me you were going to kill it!” His high estimation of the worth of life, even that of a pumpkin, is a commendable trait, especially in our current culture that tends to revolve around our own pleasures, regardless of the cost to others. It’s a message that should resonate with us as we blindly support the mass killings of other human beings that we will never have to see in an attempt to improve our quality of life or as we buy products produced in sweatshops by what amounts to little more than child slaves.
At a later point in the show, due to the condescending looks and exasperation of those around him, Linus comes to another sad but true realization, “There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin.” Once again, the musings of this boy ring true for us in our world today where the quality of discourse on these most important topics has devolved into slanderous screaming matches. In America today, the Christian world has been beguiled by the false “health and wealth” gospels espoused by charlatans like Joel Osteen. In many circles, the ideas of peace and servitude have been replaced by anger and an abhorrence of those who see things differently. Many tend to still hold to the wayward belief that this world can only be divided up into black or white, right or wrong, alienating those who realize that everything cannot be divided into two boxes, and, with their overly aggressive claims of absolute truth, they further debase the God who they claim to serve. The devaluation of honest discussions is perhaps no more prevalent than in the political world, where contumelious talk show hosts spew forth a malicious malignancy upon the public who, like those cheering on the savage lions in the Roman colliseum, desire nothing more than to see blood spilt upon the ground.
Another admirable trait about our young protagonist is his willingness to admit error. At one point during the show, he takes a flying leap into a newly raked pile of leaves while holding a lollipop, leading him to bestow upon us yet another masterful quote, “Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker.” Though many times we may come across a thing, an item or activity that we believe may endow us with great pleasure, it is not always wise for us to indulge in it. Whether it is food or drugs or sex or an assemblage of fallen foliage, there are always consequences for our actions.
While I could continue to extol the grear virtues of Linus, perhaps his greatest character trait is that of faith. In the face of opposition, as friends and family mock him with adjectives like “stupid” and “strange” and “blockhead,” Linus keeps on believing. Even though the object of his fealty is something silly (the Great Pumpkin) the idea remains the same. Strength of character is not found in fulfilling our selfish desires, regardless of the cost. It is not found in shouting down and belittling opponents in attempt to prove ourselves right. It is not found in riches and fame and glory. Rather, the strength of our character, our conviction, is found in how we handle ourselves when our strongly held beliefs are contrary to those around us. Even when others turn away, we grasp the faith tightly, and love them despite their animosity toward us.
Throwback Thursday February 19, 2009
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: church, church of christ, gender roles, Lads to Leaders, spiritual gifts, women
1 comment so far
Earlier today I was scanning through some older blog entries and, given our recent discussion on gender roles in church, I thought this entry from 2007 may be pertinent.
Originally posted: November 28, 2007
Church and Gender Discrimination
A few days ago, Rachel – my inquisitive 5 year old daughter – asked me an innocent question that she had been pondering over for some time and I have struggled with in times past.
“Daddy,” she asked, “Why are only boys preachers?”
I agonize to myself at times over how to answer questions like this from my girls – mainly because my own personal views tend to not fall in line with the status quo in our church. I thought about it for a few moments, running through various scenarios in my mind, before I replied to her with my sincere belief in the knowledge that my answer would most likely be contradictory to what she will hear in the Church of Christ.
“Honey,” I said, “Some people think that God only wants that, but they are wrong. They are very wrong.”
Her question really made me think, though. What have we done to our young ladies? We teach about spiritual gifts and how God has endowed each of us with them, but then we stifle our women at every opportunity – telling them that they have no place in the spiritual edification of men.
This stems from our mode of Biblical intrepration which, in many churches, remains steeped in modernity – where everything (or at least everything that fits a certain agenda) is black or white or right or wrong, and it is time to move forward. We must not continue to only shuttle our women to teach children below the arbitrary age of accountability. We must not tell them that their spiritual gifts are only to be used if no men are within earshot. We must pull back the Pharisaical hand of oppression that we have put upon our ladies and let them know that they are important to God – that they do have a place and a purpose in His kingdom.
This is one of the main reasons why I refuse to have my daughters participate in our church’s Lads to Leaders program. I actually wrote to the head of the program in Alabama in order to inquire whether or not it was true that, if Rachel participated, I would not be allowed to watch her read a Bible verse out loud at the annual convention. I quickly received an answer dripping with condescension from the organization explaining to me in no uncertain terms that this was the case and it would never change. So, needless to say, my daughters will never be a part of this if I have anything to say about it.
Thoughts?
Throwback Thursday #7 December 4, 2008
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: Christmas, communist, Karl Marx, Santa Claus, wealth redistribution
add a comment
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 3 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Originally Posted 12/4/07
Get Behind Me Santa!
Yes, it’s that time of year again. It’s time to string lights and ornaments upon a once-proud tree that is now dying a slow death by dehydration. It’s a time remember that occurence two millenia ago when the cattle were lowing on that silent night in the little town of Bethlehem when Jesus was born into this world. It’s a time to remember those less fortunate than ourselves. And, of course, it’s a time for that jolly old elf, Santa Claus.
But is this Santa really who we think he is?
Yesterday my friend Jacob alerted me to something rather disturbing about ol’ Kris Kringle and now the thought of his influence upon our children is causing me no small bit of uneasiness. It’s not about the overcommercialization of a Christian holiday or about the “true meaning” of Christmas. No, it is something far more sinister…
Santa is a Communist.
It must be true. The signs are undeniable that Santa is steeped in Marxist philosophy.
First of all, let’s look at the obvious outward signs – St. Nick wears red and, like Marx and Lenin and Castro, he has a beard. Just add a jolly ol’ Santa hat to this picture of Karl Marx and what do you get?
But the list doesn’t stop there, oh no. St. Nick keeps a sweat shop staffed with overworked elves living in forced poverty to make lead-ridden toys for unsuspecting American children – just like those in communist China! Not only that, but it is indisputable that his scheme of Christmas gift-giving is just another attempt by the radical left to legitimize the redistribution of wealth! So, while the bestowing of gifts may seem innocuous, the malevolent specter of Communism is just below the surface slowly indoctrinating our kids with its anti-Capitalist ideology.
And we can’t forget his covert tactics to ensure a certain behavior among the world’s children. Like Big Brother, he sees you when your sleeping, he knows when your awake. He even borrows tactics from the Soviet KGB in his “naughty or nice” list and you don’t even want to know what happens to those children deemed naughty…
So, what do you think? Is Santa really just a front for a Communist ideology that is out to destroy our American values?
Throwback Thursday #6 October 30, 2008
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: Charlie Brown, faith, halloween, linus, The Great Pumpkin
2 comments
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 3 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Originally Posted 10/29/07
Lessons from Linus
I just finished watching that Halloween classic, It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, with my girls and, as always seems to happen, I was struck by the sparkling dialogue between the featured children that goes far beyond conversations normally found in works of animation. Most notably, I find myself drawn to the unbridled optimism of Linus, who, with his tattered blanket and impressive vocabulary, carries you along on his mission of faith and hope in the face of opposition and scorn. I think we can learn quite a bit from this figure whose genesis came at the tip of a pen.
I love the first scene of the show, where Linus and his sneering sister Lucy roll a pumpkin into the house, where Lucy summarily grasps a knife, slices away the top of the large gourd, and scoops out its innards, dumping them upon the floor with a plop. Linus, though, in his innocence and respect for life wails out, “You didn’t tell me you were going to kill it!” His high estimation of the worth of life, even that of a pumpkin, is a commendable trait, especially in our current culture that tends to revolve around our own pleasures, regardless of the cost to others. It’s a message that should resonate with us as we blindly support the mass killings of other human beings that we will never have to see in an attempt to improve our quality of life or as we buy products produced in sweatshops by what amounts to little more than child slaves.
At a later point in the show, due to the condescending looks and exasperation of those around him, Linus comes to another sad but true realization, “There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics, and the Great Pumpkin.” Once again, the musings of this boy ring true for us in our world today where the quality of discourse on these most important topics has devolved into slanderous screaming matches. In America today, the Christian world has been beguiled by the false “health and wealth” gospels espoused by charlatans like Joel Osteen. In many circles, the ideas of peace and servitude have been replaced by anger and an abhorrence of those who see things differently. Many tend to still hold to the wayward belief that this world can only be divided up into black or white, right or wrong, alienating those who realize that everything cannot be divided into two boxes, and, with their overly aggressive claims of absolute truth, they further debase the God who they claim to serve. The devaluation of honest discussions is perhaps no more prevalent than in the political world, where contumelious talk show hosts spew forth a malicious malignancy upon the public who, like those cheering on the savage lions in the Roman colliseum, desire nothing more than to see blood spilt upon the ground.
Another admirable trait about our young protagonist is his willingness to admit error. At one point during the show, he takes a flying leap into a newly raked pile of leaves while holding a lollipop, leading him to bestow upon us yet another masterful quote, “Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker.” Though many times we may come across a thing, an item or activity that we believe may endow us with great pleasure, it is not always wise for us to indulge in it. Whether it is food or drugs or sex or an assemblage of fallen foliage, there are always consequences for our actions.
While I could continue to extol the great virtues of Linus, perhaps his greatest character trait is that of faith. In the face of opposition, as friends and family mock him with adjectives like “stupid” and “strange” and “blockhead,” Linus keeps on believing. Even though the object of his fealty is something silly (the Great Pumpkin) the idea remains the same. Strength of character is not found in fulfilling our selfish desires, regardless of the cost. It is not found in shouting down and belittling opponents in attempt to prove ourselves right. It is not found in riches and fame and glory. Rather, the strength of our character, our conviction, is found in how we handle ourselves when our strongly held beliefs are contrary to those around us. Even when others turn away, we grasp the faith tightly, and love them despite their animosity toward us.
Throwback Thursday #5 October 9, 2008
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: bologna, poetry, sandwich, work
add a comment
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 3 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Originally posted 2/19/07
Today, during a short respite in the constant hustle and bustle at work, I took a few moments to write a some words of verse, but, alas, because of the accursed filter I was unable to post it this afternoon. So, here it is, a bit of balladry from my hand for your enjoyment and maybe, just maybe, my words will inspire you to greatness. Without further ado…..
Ode to the Bologna Sandwich I Made For Lunch Today
What will I have for lunch?
Leftovers? Macaroni?
Aha! There it is!
A sandwich of bologna
This small circle of meat
A delicacy most divine
Though it comes from the
Unmentionable parts of swine
But not just pieces of pig
That a dog wouldn’t eat
Add some chicken scraps
And beef for this treat
Tho’ it’s origin may not
Evoke a pleasant yearning
With it’s peculiar odor
My gut starts a-churning
With these facts in order
There’s not much more to say
I think I’ll go out
For my lunchtime today
Throwback Tursday #4 July 31, 2008
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: diversity, kids, parenting, questions, race
add a comment
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 2.5 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Originally posted 5/29/2007
Diversity 101
My older daughter, Rachel, is a very inquisitive child, always question about this or that in her relentless pursuit of knowledge of this world we live in. This morning, her brow furrowed in deep scrutinizing thought, she looked at me and asked, rather matter-of-factly, “Daddy why are people different colors? Some are white and some are brown and some are black, why?”
So, I sat for a moment and pondered over her innocent search for knowledge, how exactly do you answer that question from a five year old? Do you talk about adaptability in the context of human evolution? Do you talk about the biologic polymer melanin and the effects of generations of sun exposure? Do you curtly answer, “Because God made them that way, ” and expect her to accept your solution?
No, the biology lesson is probably a bit complex for a four year old (even one as precocious as Rachel) and she’s too smart to receive the simplest answer without further questioning. So, rather than regaling her with a dermatological lesson or undermining her intelligence with a short response meant to quiet her, I turned the answer into an object lesson in tolerance and diversity.
“Honey,” I asked,” Is there anybody in the world exactly like you?”
She cocked her little head and gazed up at me quizzically, “No.”
“That’s right, you are the only Rachel who looks and acts and thinks like you do.” She hesitantly nodded her head in agreement, so I pressed on, “It’s the differences between us that make us and everybody else special. It wouldn’t be very fun if everybody was exactly like you, would it?”
She cracked a small smile and let out a little girl giggle, “No.”
“Of course it wouldn’t be any good if we were all the same! So we were each made to be different – we talk different, we act different, we think different, and we look different – some of us are even different colors. Even though we are different, we still talk to each other and play together and love each other.”
Nodding up and down and wide eyed with wonder at her newfound bit of knowledge, she replied with a simple, “Oh.”
When we arrived at the day care this morning, Rachel promptly ran into her classroom and her friends, of all different races and backgrounds, met her with a warm deluge of, “Hi, Rachel!” In no time at all, she was hard at play with her preschool playmates, all of them – the black, the white, and the hispanic – with no regard to their ethnicity or background.
There’s an awful lot you can learn from children and today, though I instructed her with my words, she taught me even more with her actions. Let’s all be good to each other – whether we are poor or rich, or black or white. Whether we speak English well or not. Whether we live in the right neighborhood or drive the right car or wear the right clothes or not. Whether we deeply love someone of the opposite or the same sex. Whether we go to a different church or belong to another faith or perhaps hold nothing as holy truth.
Thank you for teaching me so much today, Rachel.
Throwback Thursday #3 June 26, 2008
Posted by Matt in Throwback Thursday.Tags: cubicle, poetry, work
add a comment
I think we can all agree that recycling is a good thing. With that in mind, many of us make a strong effort to do so with aluminum cans and paper and plastics. What better way is there for this blog to show its support of recycling than by reusing older blog entries from the past 2.5 years that some of you might have missed the first time around? Without further ado, welcome to our semi-regular feature: Throwback Thursday.
Gleaming the Cubicle
Originally Posted 9/12/2006
Your walls remain drab and gray
A dystopian world so barren
Despite the bleakness, when I’m bored
At them, I am a-starin’
Though you are just eight by ten
You contain all that I need
A computer, phone, and some books
When I need help, to read
You have no windows, nor door to close
But I can live with that
Who the heck needs privacy
Or blue skies to look at?
I’ve only been here a few short months
So to others, I’m just a novice
But I can’t help but wonder
When I’ll get a real office!
